I woke up this morning at 5, then again at 6. I woke up this morning to what felt like change. No really, I felt like I had just had a conversation with a truly wise person and figured out how done I was with my status quo. Tired of running myself down in an unfocused frenzy, tired of not running, tired of wasting time crying over stupid little stuff, much of which is out of my hands anyways. I felt like the Universe kicked me out of bed saying "Enough is enough, go do!"
So.... at 6am PST I began anew. I got on google and mapped out my 2mile path, put on running shoes, grabbed 2 bags of dumpster bound trash and headed out the door. The iPod continued my morning wake up call theme with the following shuffled selections. (excluding the Sia track, I was already playing that one in my head)
1. SiA - Death by Chocolate
2. Olive - All I Ever Needed
3. Ani Difranco - Knuckle Down
4. Papa Roach - Sometimes
5. Floetry - If I was a Bird
6. Sade - Somebody Already Broke my Heart
7. Incubus - Blood on the Ground
Each one of these random selections gave me something new... ok not new, definitely not the first time I had heard them nor the messages it seemed like they were giving me, but definitely listening with fresh ears. It's amazing when you feel the pull...
And now, I just listened to Tears for Fears' "Brian Wilson Said" where I pulled the title of my new blog from.
Following that with Christian Aguilara's "Singing My Song" which I firmly believe says it all....
For those who are curious, look up the lyrics to that last one and know that I acknowledge and take it all to heart. I'm reclaiming my inner peace, for my sake and for the sake of those around me for whom I care. Starting from the inside, moving on to my home (and truly making it so) and moving on from there.
Making hard choices because I have to. Cutting down on the partying and selling the bike (don't say it, I have to, it's paid off and school isn't) I'm spending more time at home putting it together so that it can be a place I'm proud of. This is the start, much more to come, but I'm "going to keep on singing my song"
xo
